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Ponderings of a Coughing Man


Random Ponderings of a Coughing Man


While lying on the couch, waiting for my cough syrup to stop my coughing…my random thinking led to some random non-thoughts. (I don’t know what that would be either.) Allow me to share:

  • In my impaired state, if I was driving at the speed of light…what would happen if I turned on my headlights?

  • Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?

  • Has there ever been a mouse-flavored cat food?

  • I’m bald and have never looked at my driver’s license to what color they put in “Hair”. It’s …?

  • This then led me to wonder, are eyebrows “facial hair”?

  • If your child refused to take a nap would they be guilty of resisting a rest?

  • Vanilla ice cream is white, but vanilla extract is brown. Why?

  • If God sneezed, what would you say?

  • Is there an expiration on fortune cookie fortunes?

  • Why do caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing?

  • What’s another word for thesaurus?

  • When people from France use profane language (cuss), do they say “Excuse my English?”

  • Does toilet bowl cleaner come in any other color than blue? (Did you really go look?)

  • OK, “fat chance”, and “slim chance” …mean the same thing. Right? Who came up with that one?


I really must talk to my Doctor about his choice in cough syrup.


I’m still lying on the couch…coughing. But, lying here I have had the time to consider my random thinking as I have looked at my ceiling for far too long. And, I’m proud to say I have come to a conclusion.


My ceiling needs re-painting.

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